It’s been a while since we’ve heard a good Twin Peaks rumor. So Welcome to Twin Peaks reached out to the oracle of Twin Peaks, Ray Wise, who recently founded a cult following called The Legion of Wise. I know, it’s April Fools’ Day, but I’m not kidding.
Turns out Ray Wise ran out of juicy facts and already told us everything he knew about Twin Peaks and the upcoming Blu-ray. That’s why Ray decided to turn to YOU. Here’s his personal message to the readers of Welcome to Twin Peaks, preceded by (what else?) a little bit of classic Mairzy Doats:
Have you heard a good Twin Peaks rumor lately? Send me your favorite. Maybe I’ll spread it.
So you know what to do! Make up the craziest rumors about the Blu-ray, the show, or any of the cast and crew, or fantasize about what would be the most unimaginable Twin Peaks dream come true. Be specific. Be very specific! And share them with @therealRaywise and @ThatsOurWaldo on Twitter and/or leave it in the comments it below. Ray will read all of your “rumors”, do the Leland shuffle and, who knows, spread some.
Fire walk with 
Ray, I heard the Twin Peaks Blu-ray will come with a can of garmonbozia. Expired 25 years ago.
I’m sure eating it will affect your sleep… and dreams.
Dead Laura Palmer will appear in the next season of AMC’s The Walking Dead!!!
Bastille frontman Dan Smith cast as young Leland Palmer in “Twin Peaks: Wanna Play With Fire” prequel.
Oh, he’d wish! 🙂
Oh I wish ;)(I love Bastille too!)
There’s going to be a new Twin Peaks spin-off series about Deer Meadow and the life of Teresa Banks.
I’d watch that! Bring back Sheriff Cable!
An extremely hard-to-activate Blu-Ray easter egg (involving entering a combination of clues from the Giant and the Log Lady), will reveal a shocking deleted scene – or perhaps, even longer footage.
Yes, please!
For the last 25 years Cooper has been in the
Black lodge and now sherrif Trueman needs
To enter the white lodge to find and save him.
The Man from another place marries Laura Palmer in the Black Lodge and David Lynch is the priest 😉 (You can tell I’m not that great at making these amazing rumours!)
There is going to be a Twin Peaks spin-off and the only characters apprearing in it will be Leland, Laura, Coop, LMFAP and Phillip Jeffries.
The new film is about a new serial killer investigation (adding to R, B, T the remaining letters one by one: O, E, R) with new FBI leads who consult the TP Sheriff Dept. when clues point to a resident (a normal-seeming Cooper). A discovery: when Bob gets to his last letter he will destroy the B. Lodge and everyone in it, and the new Feds must stop him.
After 25 years the good Cooper will rise from his chair in the black lodge. He knows that the times has come. 25 years ago as Laura said the words “see you in 25 years” she placed “The Ring” in Cooper’s pocket. Bob and Coop face each other in the black lodge and Coop says “I have a gift for you” and Shows Bob the ring in his Hand. Bob starts to scream in agony as a swarm of owls rushes in and picks his eyes out before eating him to death.
Explicit instructions included in the bluray package on the perfect bean to water,grind ratio to brew that damn coffee!
I heard the blu ray will be available in 3D
Unseen footage of Diane & Dale has been discovered. It will be included as an extra on the Bluray.
Diane is played by Isabella Rossellini.
There will be a tv series by David related to Audrey Horne in Hollywood. She will meet Betty and Diane from Mulholland Drive, Mr. Roque and Mrs. Tremond and nephew.
The Black Lodge and Black Coffee are part of the equation. The Man In Black in The Dark Tower and Lost, are BOB. BOB is an acronym…BET ON BLACK. Blaine the Mono is heading for the crash … and when you think it’s all over, it’s not over, it’s not over… Head crashes repeatedly into mirror u inverse while laughing. The Black Lodge escaped itself, now all over Twin Peaks. The Black Lodge is the…. it is to soon to mention that. ~?Derek Michael (In the Burning Fires of Hell…Fire Walk With Me)
If you turn down the bass all the way, turn up the treble and the volume (carefully) right after the first iteration of “The black dog runs at night” you will hear a voice say… Satan’s Cult.. wait is it still a rumor if it’s true?
The big secret is that twenty-five years later, this is all playing out exactly the way is was supposed to. There was no ending. There never is.