“There once was a girl wrapped in plastic…”
Or “A long-haired killer called BOB…”
So many great possibilities for creepy Twin Peaks limericks, yet this morning I wasn’t able to find any. Not even a David Lynch themed one! Since today, May 12th, is Limerick Day, I thought I’d ask you via Facebook and Twitter to come up with a few good ones. Below are some of my favorites submitted over the past few hours.
There once was an agent named Dale
Who put all the bad guys in jail
Til a spirit named BOB
Led him to a Black Lodge
And from there he was destined to fail
—@CurbsidePress
A place where there’s always music in the air
Hides a secret that will certainly scare
I’ve got good news
Your soul you will lose
In this world we say “J’ai une âme solitaire”
—Thomas P. Elwood Rose
For a tale filled with murder and lies,
(And for fans of @therealraywise)
Twin Peaks has the lot
With coffee in the pot
And a fish hidden as a surprise
—@amandacoban
Agent Cooper, he followed a dream
Killer BOB, he then did scheme
Seen in the Black Lodge
Doppelgänger to dodge
The owls are not what they seem
—Thomas P. Elwood Rose
Laura’s gaze is insatiable
But Maddy’s can be mistakable
Sometimes my arms bend back
Sometimes the lodge is black
BOB’s death bag is inescapable
—@Dionysus_Jones
If you follow the trail of Miss P,
at the scene of the crime you’ll be
On a pile of mud
In the killer’s own blood
are the words “Fire, walk with me”
—Craig Mitchell
Leland dances in tears of his daughter
She’d been led like a lamb to the slaughter
By sex, drugs and lies
Comes the fatal surprise
She was found wrapped in plastic in water
—@VeganNeil
Black as midnight on a moonless night.
Several screams pierced the air with deep fright
They wanted to flee
Fire walk with me
Garmonbozia now binds them tight
—Thomas P. Elwood Rose
A pretty young woman called Laura
Had a bloomin’ great chink in her aura
This letter Killer BOB in
Unleashed lots of Sin
Almost making a match for Pandora
—@VeganNeil
There’s a man named Lynch
Who makes fab films in a pinch
Be it coffee, log,
or lawnmower road hog
Enjoyment is all but a cinch
—@GrindhouseDave
BONUS: I also asked you to complete Pete Martell‘s limerick that was so rudely interrupted by his wife, Catherine. Here’s one of my favorite suggestions:
There once as a lady from Galloway
Who left her log in the hallway
The owls came out,
There was coffee with trout,
And the delegates went back to Norway!
—@CupOfTea69
Thanks to everyone who took the time to write a Twin Peaks or David Lynch themed limerick! If you can come up with a great one, go ahead and share it in the comments.
Fire walk with 
That should be Galway not Galloway.